Salad Dressing and Diplomacy

Someone once said that making salad dressing was like diplomacy: you have to know how much oil to mix with one's vinegar.

I think that applies to a lot of things in life--the balance of being nice and friendly, combined with being tart and irritated, in just the right mixture.

I was thinking about this when I was thinking about an aquaintence. We interact every now and then, and our working relationship is cordial, but I wouldn't say it was warm. In thinking about it, I was struck at how many differences we have in our lives, and how it affects our interactions.

Let's see. I can't stand the club scene, don't like to drink, am not what you'd consider a fashionista in any sense of the word. I've been to university, own my own apartment, and have a couple of university degrees under my belt. I'm down to earth, serious, and usually (USUALLY) possessed of a certain gravitas (some might call stolid). I'm sarcastic, witty, but definitely not a drama queen. I believe in a more traditional sense of God and religion.  I'm an introvert. It stands to reason, therefore, that my counterpart is the opposite of me in every single thing that I've listed here.

So it really came as no shock when I evaluated the working relationship I have with this person to realize that despite the warmth that exuded from it, it really was more of a false sincerity. And that did surprise me. But only for an instant. I realized after going through this exercise that we really are different in the core values that we have. Like night and day, oil and water. We don't mix.
But I have another friend--we are opposites in many many ways, but we still manage to get together and hang out, and I'd trust him like a brother if I needed someone's help.

So what's the difference between the two people? Or, more to the point, does the difference lie with me?

I think that's the mystery of humankind. The fact that we can be opposites to so many people, and yet complement each other--and be opposite to so many people, and be antagonistic to them. Or vice versa. What is it that makes the difference? Some ineffable quality that can't be named--an aura? a soul? Is it something that is bred in our bones--we look at them and say, "No, I don't like them", and that's it?

Is it intuition or a gut feeling?

But at the heart of it, is there anything we can do about it?

Karma? Don't believe in it!

First and foremost, I hope everyone is having a good start to 2012 :) Happy New Year!!

Karma. Fate.  Divine Providence. Which one do you believe? A couple of friends and I had a conversation at work about karma, and religion. But first, a general definition of the 3.

Karma is the general thought that good actions cause good actions and that bad actions cause bad actions. That what you do has a direct bearing on what you experience in life. Thus, bad or evil actions can result in bad karma, while positive actions can result in good karma. That actions cause other actions, etc.

Fate, or destiny, I believe, is the general thought that while things are predestined to occur in your life, you can't really stop them, but more importantly...there is no higher power involved. There is no God.

Providence, or Divine Providence...is that your life is controlled to a certain extent by God. That we are not wandering around life like aimless fishes swimming in a pool, but God is controlling our path based on His plan for us, and while we may have some choices, we don't have many.

Again, these are not philosophical definitions, but definitions that I'm using.

So, onto the conversation.

I stirred up a hornets nest  when I declared that I don't believe in Karma, because I believe in God, and Christianity. Namely...the doctrine of Christianity states that you will get into Heaven because not because you are necessarily good, or perfect, but because you believe in God, and are willing to be forgiven for all the things you've done wrong.

Furthermore...Christianity believes that you can't barter your way through life by doing good things and expecting good things to happen in return. You do good...and you can be S**T on. HARD. You could do bad things...and have a completely normal and excellent life filled with many pleasures. The point is that in Christianity...God has a plan for your life...and nothing you can really do will be able to change that.

Now, agreed, this is one aspect of Christianity, and one viewpoint. There are others. But most of them would firmly reject the ideal of doing good works in order to guarantee that your lot in life will improve. Simply because it takes something that is in God's hands...and places it somewhere else.

So do I try to do good? Of course! Do I do it to avoid bad things in life? As a consequence of my actions, yes. That is,  I don't want to be mean to a co-worker, because I have to work with him or her and they could make my life difficult. However, do I do good things because I expect to be protected from the evil karma floating around?

Am I paralyzed by a fear that if I AM mean to a co-worker, karma is going to somehow raise its ugly head and get me back somehow? No.

I believe in divine providence. Karma (good or bad) isn't going to lay a hand on me, unless God wants it to...but then, it isn't karma now, is it? ;)